Dylanisms

-At breakfast one morning...
Me: Do you want a granola bar?
Dylan: Yea!
Me: We could share one.
Dylan: Uh... no...you could eat one all up, and I could eat one all up!

-I took him to Arby's for the first time, one evening for dinner. I was holding him, and ordering our food. Suddenly, he leaned
WAY over, into the cashier's face, and asked, "Uh... You got pizza?!" She didn't even crack a smile. Just answered, "No, we don't have pizza". He leaned in again, for effect. "Uh... You got milk?"

-We took him to the Stride Rite outlets yesterday, to see if we could get some discounted shoes, since he wears a 9 1/2 WIDE, and we can only shop at Stride Rite. We found rain boots - one pair was green frogs, the other blue monsters. I liked the green frogs, Jim liked the blue monsters. We couldn't decide, so we asked Dylan to make the decision.
Me: Which ones do you like?
Dylan: Both of them.
Me: Okay, which ones do you like best?
Dylan: Mommy likes the frogs... Daddy likes the monsters...
Me: Yes, but which ones do you like? Which ones do you want to get?
Dylan: Uh... Both of them? (My little diplomat!)

-As anyone who has, or has had a toddler knows, sometimes it is really, really hard to understand what they are saying. Sometimes they are pronouncing the word wrong. Sometimes they are using the wrong word for the situation. Sometimes they are jumbling their words together. Lately, though, I've been having another problem. I understand exactly what he is saying, but I can't figure out WHY he is saying what he is saying. Toddlers don't exactly explain their train of though, you know.

Yesterday, while sitting at the table eating lunch, Dylan was looking out our sliding glass door, into the backyard. He suddenly laughed, and remarked, "There were two pigs in the mud!" After I looked in our backyard to make sure two pigs hadn't actually wandered into our yard, I asked, "There were two pigs in the mud?" Again, he laughed, and said, "Yea!" I had NO IDEA what he was talking about, but I've learned there are a few survival phrases when living with a toddler, and you have NO IDEA what they are talking about.
1. Answer, "Really?!"
2. Answer, "Wow!", and repeat whatever they said. "Two pigs in the mud!"
3. Ask them a follow up question... "Why were they in the mud?" This one can sometimes backfire, though, because they might seem annoyed that you are asking them a stupid question, and they might catch on that you have NO IDEA what they are talking about.

What sometimes happens is, I realize hours, or even days later, what he was talking about. Later that day, we were reading a book, and sure enough, there were two pigs in the mud on one page! "Dylan! This is what you were talking about earlier! These are the two pigs in the mud!" Of course, he had NO IDEA what I was talking about.