Drive-Thru Preschool

Two days ago I went to visit a friend, and I went along on the walk to drop off her 5 year old son at preschool. When we arrived at the church it is held in, the parents and kids were all congregated in the area in front of the building. Being an ex-preschool teacher myself, I was very curious about the procedure, so I asked my friend about it. She told me when it is time for preschool to begin, the teacher comes to the door, lets the children in, and then takes them to their classroom. "You're kidding!?", I replied. "You don't take them to the classroom?". She said, "No, I think they feel that if we take them in, it will be harder for the kids to separate from us, and there will be long, drawn out goodbyes".

Believe me, I have witnessed the "long, drawn out goodbye". Some kids can dramatize it to an Oscar winning performance level. I have seen parents weep, children actually throw up from getting so hysterical, kids going horizontal while hanging on to their parents legs for dear life as I tried to calmly pry them off, etc. I have seen parents actually give in, and stick around for circle time because their child (or them) couldn't bear to say goodbye just yet. I have seen parents use bribes, threats, reasonings and long drawn out explanations. I understand the need to eliminate the "long, drawn out goodbye".

Later, when we returned to pick up her son, the parents again crowded around the door to the building and waited. At this point, I became perplexed. "Wait! So, the teacher just opens that door, and they come running out, and that's it?!" "Yes", she replied, looking at me like I was a weirdo for getting so worked up. "She doesn't talk to you? You get no feedback about how they were, or what they did that day, or what they are learning? You never get to see the classroom?" "We got to see the classroom at orientation, she talks to us if there is a problem, and she sends home newsletters each month talking about what they will be learning".

Some of you might be wondering why this was all so amazing to me. I taught preschool for 3 years at a local daycare, and all of this is making me realize how incredibly hard I worked for the pathetic $9.50 an hour that I was making. Actually, when I started, I made $8.25, but I worked my way up to a whopping $9.50. When I worked the morning shift, I would be stopped by parents on my way into the building to discuss little so and so's newest dilemma. I hadn't even taken my coat off, or reached the door to the classroom! Sometimes there were parents waiting for me in the classroom when I arrived, who would act like they were doing me some great favor by helping me take down the chairs off the top of the tables, while little so and so prepped the room for me, by taking every toy down from the shelves, while their parent crooned "Aren't they good little helpers?" The parents brought the children into the room at all sorts of different times, whenever it suited them. They felt free to sit in on circle time, snack time, story time, play time, Jen's losing her mind time, whenever.

It was one of the three teachers jobs to take out the "one o clockers". These were the kids whose moms were stay at home moms - who just sent them to preschool for the learning and social aspects, not for daycare. Keep in mind this was also the time the other stay all day kids were laying down for nap time. Naptime lasted from one until two thirty. Can you imagine trying to get 18 or so 4 and 5 year olds to stay on their mats for an hour and a half! Madness! The reason it was so long was because this was the only way all three teachers could get their 1/2 hour break, and get all the bulletin boards created, crafts prepared, paperwork done, etc. Anyway, I digress. The teacher in charge of the "one o clockers" would talk to EACH parent about their child's day. We were at their mercy until we humbly excused ourselves by explaining it was time for our break. Sometimes even this explanation wouldn't stop them from continuing to assault you with so and so's latest funny anecdote.

In the evenings we talked to each parent briefly, or sometimes not so briefly. The one year that all three teachers from our room couldn't work late into the evening and had someone from another classroom take over, we were told this was unacceptable. The parents weren't being told about so and so's day! We had to keep notebooks for each child, and write a note to each parent about each child's day. We weren't given extra time to do this, so we usually ended up having to cram this in along with the other nap time things that needed done, or worse, on our breaks.

The first nanny job I took involved taking a little girl to her preschool in the Fox Chapel area. The first day I took her, I felt like I was in a Twilight Zone episode. There was a line of cars, waiting to pull up to the curb, where the teacher was waiting! We didn't even turn off our cars, just let the kids out, then drove away - a drive-thru preschool! The whole year that I took her, I never once saw the classroom, I only caught quick glimpses of the other kids in the class, and I never had an actual conversation with the teacher longer than a few sentences. (Jim said soon they will just have things like those bank vacuum chutes - stick your kid in, press a button and they are whisked away into a huge ball pit in the classroom!)

As a former teacher I can appreciate all of these procedures that preschools have adopted. They are so much easier on the teachers, who believe me, already have a very difficult job. However, as a mother, I now have a completely new perspective. I understand why those parents needed to tell me so and so's newest dilemma, funny anecdote, or even just to talk my ear off because they hadn't had an adult conversation all day! I understand how difficult it must be to let go, and leave your precious child in the care of others. I understand the need to know all the details of their day, that you feel cheated to not be a part of. Since I remember what it was like to be a teacher, will I be the type of mom every teacher dreams about? I hope so, but probably not. They will probably roll their eyes as I tell them Dylan's newest funny anecdote, but as long as they tell me about his day, I won't care.
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