Before 40: May: A & B

A:

For a really long time, I have wanted to go to a restaurant in my town called "The Melting Pot".  I didn't know a lot about the place, but I knew it was a "fondue" restaurant and dipping pretty much anything in chocolate sounds like a great idea to me.  I knew the place had a "romantic" setting, that there were several courses, and that it was expensive, and that's about it.

Jim and I were celebrating our 10th anniversary, so that seemed like a perfect reason to finally get my fondue on!  Jim made the reservations and when we got there I was surprised to find that he had arranged to have flowers on the table.  We were at a cozy table in the corner, with romantic candles lit.  Things were starting off the way I imagined.  Then, as I strained my old lady eyes to see the tiny print on the dimly lit menu, my eyes almost popped out of my head when I saw the prices.  Yikes!

Our waitress brought the first course, pieces of bread to dip in cheese.  Then we had fruit to dip.  Jim had a couple beers and we were enjoying the meal.  Then, it was time for the main course.  It was when our waitress brought over the trays of uncooked meat and veggies that I heard the record scratch in my head.  When she started to quickly explain how we were to cook everything - how long and in what order - my mouth fell open and I stared at her in shock.

When she walked away I exclaimed to Jim, "WE'RE SUPPOSED TO COOK OUR OWN FOOD?!  ON OUR ANNIVERSARY?!  WHY THE HELL WOULD WE WANT TO DO THAT?!?!"  Jim was amused.  He was also the cook.  I told him later, "It's a good thing you took over and cooked the food, because I was just going to sit there and stare at it, until SOMEONE cooked it that wasn't me".
The "free" champagne and chocolate dipping session sweetened the deal a bit, but still.  Paying that much to cook our own food?  Ridiculous.  I did enjoy the company of my handsome husband, though.

B:

The second "new" thing for May wasn't something I had never tried before.  I had tried it many times...as a kid, and even as an adult, in a Walmart aisle while my friend yelled that I was embarrassing her.  I figured it was something that I just never would be able to do.  But, then we took Dylan to the International Children's Festival, and I discovered that at the ripe old age of 39, I can do this...

Two Realizations Brought On By A Vacation

Some of you have been wondering where I've been.  I really haven't been blogging much at all lately.  I wasn't sure exactly why, until I looked back through my photos.  Then, I figured it out.

Two things happened to me while we were on our trip to Disney.

1.  I had a fantastic time.  I was relaxed, happy, carefree, and present.  One reason for that could have been that I didn't watch much TV, or use the computer (I did use the iphone to post photos, though!).  The biggest reason I was so stress-free, though, was that I wasn't in my house.  I probably need to explain that statement.  When I'm in my house, I am constantly thinking "I need to..."  I am in a perpetual state of "to-do-list mania".  I have a very hard time being at ease... in my own home!  I had a bit of an "a-ha moment" with that realization.    While on vacation, I read the book (that is a big deal in itself - I.read.a.book!) - The Happiness Project.  It's a great book, but the part that stood out the most for me was when she talked about organizing her home.  She said that "many people believe that their physical surroundings influence their spiritual happiness".  I had the realization that not having paint or artwork on the walls and not having things organized, was causing me a huge amount of stress.

2.  I loved spending time with my son, my husband, and my parents.  Don't get me wrong.  I always love spending time with all of them.  But, I don't always savor it as much.  There were so many moments on vacation when I looked at my son and my husband, laughing together, or at my parents as they walked hand in hand with my son, and I thought "This time in my life won't last forever.  This moment is beautiful and special and I'm living it RIGHT NOW, and I need to appreciate it".  I don't do that enough when my mind is consumed with to-do lists.  

So, what came from these two realizations I had?  Well, first, I decided that we had to decorate/organize the house.  I need paint on the walls.  I need art hung on the walls and family photos.  I need to feel like my house is a home - an oasis that I feel comfortable and at ease in.

Second, I decided I wanted to spend less time writing about living and spend more time... well... living.

Funny, that the first realization gave me a ton more to-do lists though, huh?  What can I say?  I don't claim to make sense.  I'm not saying I'm done blogging.  I'm just saying that this summer at least, the posts will probably be few.  But, I hope you'll check back every once in a while and see what we've been up to.  Here's what we've been doing... (besides decorating and organizing)...

Playing at playgrounds...

Yes, I am exercising!  Can you believe it?  Dylan has actually given up his book reading time before bed to do the workouts with me on many occasions!

The International Children's Festival

Graduation from preschool

We've all been enjoying the new trampoline!

The Strawberry Festival

The Three Rivers Arts Festival.  We saw a free Steve Songs concert, and then bought a CD, and we've been listening to it since.  The guy is a musical genius in my opinion!  If you have a kid under the age of 7, click here...

There's also been many, many t-ball games, a 10th anniversary celebration, and two "Before 40" posts I need to catch up on, so I'm still WAY behind.  Stay tuned...

Crazy Comparisons to Make Me Cry

I have really been letting the blogging thing slide lately, haven't I?  There is a post I've been wanting to write for a while, and I'm finally getting around to it.

If you're a faithful reader, you know that I have this thing I like to do.  I like to take photos of Dylan in the same spot, year after year, and see how much he changes.  Each time I do it, I get all nostalgic and sappy, so I'm not sure why I keep doing it.  I guess I enjoy torturing myself?

There is this farm that I've been going to since I was a kid.  I don't know what it is about this farm, but I swear I get better pictures there than just about anywhere else.  The first time we went that Dylan could walk, I took this shot...

(May 2008 - 1 year)

Oh my gosh... I'm gonna need tissues for this post, aren't I?!  Here's the progression...

(2009)

(Sept. 2010)

(May 2012)

The first time I wrote about this farm, I wrote that I took Dylan out of the stroller, turned away for a second to get a picture, and found that he was walking along this wall...

(Oct. 2008 - almost 2 years old)

(That was when the renegade stroller took off down the steep hill to the left, careening towards the road.  Fun times.)  The funny thing is, look what happened in the years ahead...

(Sept. 2010 - 3yrs)

(Oct. 2011 - 4 yrs)

(May 2012 -5 yrs)

When I was a kid, I had to walk along the "balance beam" each time I went to the farm.  Here's my kid... a chip off the old block...

(2009)

(2011)

(May 2012)

There is this beat up shed on the property that serves as the perfect backdrop, year after precious year...

(April 2009)

(Nov. 2009)

(Aug. 2011)

(Oct. 2011)

(May 2012)

Hope you enjoyed that walk down memory lane as much as I did! (SOB!)

The Lifeguard

Lately, I've been missing writing for writing's sake.  So, when I came across Mama Kat's writing prompts, I decided to give one a try.  This is the one I chose...


3.) Write about a time you saw someone doing something kind for someone else. (inspired by Gigi’s Ramblings)


A couple of summers ago, the two girls I was a nanny for and I were spending the day at the pool.  They were both taking a swimming class, and I was lounging happily by the side of the pool.  I was very amused, watching two teenage girls giggle and ogle a very good looking lifeguard.  I could hear their overexcited gushes of adoration, and it took me back.  Suddenly I had visions of myself and my friends at that age, discussing the dreamy factor of each lifeguard at the pool.  Of course, we never actually talked to  the dreamy lifeguards!  We were much too busy working on our tans, and talking about what they were probably like to find out what they were actually like. Ahh... the good old days.

I sat there chuckling to myself as I thought of the silly me from the past, when something caught my attention.  One of the boys in the class was causing a fairly big scene.  He was making it very obvious to everyone at the pool that he did not want to get in the water.  It was obvious that he had special needs (possibly autism), and that the mother had no idea what to do at that moment, and was wishing she could disappear... or be rescued.

Suddenly, Mr. Dreamy Lifeguard swam over.  He very calmly climbed out of the water, and sat next to the boy.  I couldn't hear what he was saying, but I could see him talking to the boy.  Then, he got into the water, went under, and came up grinning at him.  He cupped his hands and very gently poured a little water on the boys feet, the whole time talking to the boy in a very kind way.  Before I knew it, the boy's legs were dangling in the water, and not longer after that, Mr. Dreamy Lifeguard was holding him in the water.

I could barely take my eyes off Mr. Dreamy Lifeguard.  He was so patient, so kind, so sweet.  I looked over at the boy's mother, who was also mesmerized by the sight.  She looked so happy and so relieved that I felt my eyes tearing up.  What an amazing guy Mr. Dreamy Lifeguard was at such a young age, (I guessed his age to be about 17).  I found myself hoping that my son would be that patient, kind, and sweet at his age.  Then, I laughed to myself, thinking "Well, times have certainly changed!  Instead of ogling the good looking lifeguard because I want to date him, I'm hoping my son grows up to be like him!  I am officially OLD!"

Later that day, as I walked out of the pool with the girls, I walked past Mr. Dreamy Lifeguard.  I stopped and told him, "I just wanted to tell you that you did a really great job with that little boy during the class earlier.  You were so patient and kind".  "Oh, thanks", he answered.  "He's a great kid".  I started to walk away, but turned to put my hand on his arm, saying "So are you".

I turned to see the giggly teenage girls watching us.  Maybe it was my imagination, but I could've sworn I heard one exclaim "Oh my gawd!  She touched him!"  I laughed and thought about my little boy, and how anxious I was to see him later that day.  These days are pretty good too.

Ten Years of Bliss

Ten years ago today, I was in a room at a resort in Jamaica, waiting to marry Jim.  I reached up into the closet to pull my shoes down, and an envelope fell to the floor.  Jim had left a letter for me.

He said, (among other things), "I want you to know that I will always be there for you, through the peaks and valleys, and will never let you down.  I will very much enjoy growing old with you..."

Ten years later, I have a whole box of cards and letters Jim has made for me over the years, but that letter he left on our wedding day is still my favorite.

I've had many "schemes" in our 10 years.  The newest is the obsession with decorating and organizing the house.  We had this email exchange yesterday...



From: Jen
Reply-To: Jen
Date: Wed, 9 May 2012 10:37:58 -0700 (PDT)
To: Jim
Subject: artHey Gorgeous,
Living Social has a deal - $70 worth of stuff on art.com <http://art.com>  for $35. (deal is running for the next 7 days only).  We need to figure out what we're doing!!  (NO PRESSURE)

---

 From: Jim
 To: Jen
 Sent: Wednesday, May 9, 2012 1:40 PM
 Subject: Re: art
 

Re: art 


NO PRESSURE.

LYBT

---

From: Jen
Reply-To: Jen
Date: Wed, 9 May 2012 10:49:21 -0700 (PDT)
To: Jim
Subject: Re: artHa!  If you wanted to hang THIS on our wall, we wouldn't make it to 11 years of happily married bliss.  It IS bliss, right?!



 
  

---

Exquisite Bliss.


_________________________________________________________________

I smiled when I read his answer - "Exquisite Bliss".  In ten years, there's been arguments, stress, and difficult situations.  There has been funerals, tears, ended friendships, and financial struggles.  But, there has also been so much love, joy, and as evidenced by these emails... laughter.  

It HAS been exquisite, Jim!  I'm enjoying growing old with you.  (We're not old yet, despite what our weak eyes and aching backs say).  

ILYBT (I Love You Big Time),

Jen

Before 40: April

You've probably seen these "Hurricane Simulators".  They are in malls, and arcades everywhere you look these days.  I've walked past them numerous times and thought, "I'm too old for that nonsense".

Today I had a rare Tuesday off (I usually work Mondays and Tuesdays), so I took Dylan to an arcade.  We played a bunch of games, we got some plastic crap with our tickets, we shared a pretzel.  But, I just kept looking over at that hurricane thing.  A bunch of kids stuffed themselves in it, and squealed and laughed.  Some teenage girls got in, giggling hysterically.

My inner voice said, "Your hair will be a hot mess if you do that".  But, then I thought, "So?!  Do I want to live my life afraid to get dirty, afraid to make a fool out of myself, afraid to mess up my hair?  Or do I want to have fun and LIVE MY LIFE?"

My inner voice said, "You're too old for that nonsense" again.  This time, though, I told my inner voice to shove it.  My hair (and my trusty side kick's) got completely messed up... and I loved it.

Before 40: March: Disney Trip - Day 3